Take me out to the movies

This is my first blog, which I liken to writing a journal entry. To let you know a little about me, my husband and I have been married for over 26 years and have two daughters. One is recently married and the other just finished her junior year in college. I’ve been a licensed parent educator since 2000.

On Sunday our family had lunch with our extended family where we had an energetic discussion of movies and video games. My niece had seen Iron Man 2 the night before. She was upset that there were young children viewing a movie that was rated PG 13. Another family member gave an enlightening point of view that the draw of adventure movies or video games is that you, or your child, can experience something that can’t be experienced in real life. Children get to experience what it might be like to interact with a centaur, mermaid, or minotaur! Knowing that young children aren’t able to differentiate between real life and fantasy, I question if it is the best for them to experience these fantasies, especially if it includes an action-adventure character like Iron Man, Spider Man, or a Transformer. These characters can dehumanize us as people. They can minimize or ignore feelings that caring people have.

I understand that parents like to go to a movie or maybe play a video game with their child as a way of connecting. I am curious how do you decide which movie to see with your child? How do you determine what is age-appropriate for your child? There are so many choices for parents to make. And with the heavy marketing of movies via commercials, there is even more pressure from children to their parents to see what seems popular. I’d love to hear from you how you make the decision of what to allow your child to watch or play.

It's there if you take time to notice...

I recently took an infant class and was reminded by another participant to slow down and see the beauty in my child growing and changing each day. It’s a simple concept that requires little elaboration, rather reflection as to how you can selectively remove daily distractions to provide you with more time to slow down and really enjoy the mystifying beauty that lies within your child. What distractions are you dismissing in order to spend more time with your little ones? What have you been completely amazed by when you took the time to notice?


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Jen Skrukrud is a mother to an 8 month old man-on-the-move. She is savoring the snuggle time she has with her son each day.

As family traditions go Halloween is one “holiday” that lacked traditions for my family. I am working to change that. No, Halloween isn’t my favorite holiday, however I do recognize it as a time to create great memories with my child and in the future allow my child to dream, pretend, be silly, and enjoy himself.

In the midst of all this I am left thinking about what to let my child be for Halloween. He is a mere 7 months old yet I feel somehow like I am making a statement with his costume. I have decided my son is going to be a caterpillar for Halloween. After all, why not have him dress up as a character from a book? The Very Hungry Caterpillar is one of my favorites, and if you’ve seen my son you know “very hungry” goes right along with his personality. Another reason I chose this costume is because it is non-violent. I believe there is enough violence in the world and children are exposed to too many violent acts as youngsters as it is. For kids, Halloween should be about the magic of pretending, the excitement of putting on a costume and parading around town, not about violence, gore, and death. What non-violent costume will your child be wearing this year?

Jen is the mother to a 6 month old son who has started rolling and creeping. She is un-decorating the house to accommodate his curiosity for all things “off limits”.

A Sign of the Times

These days people are worried about keeping their jobs and putting food on the table for their family members. I attended a PAIIR advisory board meeting tonight and Peggy O'Toole-Martin said something that resonated. She talked about the hard times people are experiencing and the importance of being sensitive to the people around us.

I met a married couple at Target after the meeting. The husband shared with me that he had just been laid off. His last day of work is Friday and he seemed like he was becoming accustomed to telling people the news. I wanted to tell him that he had nothing to worry about and that he would easily find a job, but I bit my tongue and listened. I told them that if they needed anything they could call me.

I want this generation of children to be known for their kindness. I believe the hard times will teach them about sacrifice, compassion and resilience.

I read a story about a daughter who was touched by her father's kindness and his ability to talk to people from all walks of life. Later I shared how much this story touched me, and she told me the story of her father's passing. He died in the nursing home. When she asked the cleaning woman to tell the appropriate person that he had passed, she was informed by the woman that her father was always kind and that he took the time to get to know her name and her children’s' names. When she cleaned his room he asked her how her children were doing; this touched the woman deeply.

I am amazed how much it means to people to acknowledge who they are and the importance of their existence. I strive to be a good example to my daughter because I realize the way I treat people is the way she will treat others as well.

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Jinny Max has a 3-year-old daughter named Maya who is in preschool. Jinny is a HUGE supporter of PAIIR. She believes she wouldn't have survived her first year in Rochester without PAIIR.