Monday, August 23, 2010

Transitioning to Kindergarten

There are not many negative things to say about participating in the PAIIR program. Maybe you'd feel sad that you didn't get into the class you really hoped to get into because all of your friends got in, or maybe you wish there were more classes held after you were done with work. The fact is most of the people who attend PAIIR love it. Most are sad when their children age out of PAIIR. I like to joke that I had a third child just so I could participate for 5 more years.

The one thing that PAIIR does not prepare you for is the transition to Kindergarten. Don't get me wrong. The KIDS are prepared fantastically. It's the parents who are ill-prepared for sending their children into the unknown.

PAIIR is fantastic in that it lets you get to know other parents and their children (in most cases) quite well. Strong bonds can be formed in as little as a few months. I am still in contact with many of the families I met when my oldest child (now 8 years old) was in PAIIR. Some of them I met in infant classes with daughter.

By the time your child is about to leave the PAIIR program you, as a parent, start to take for granted that you know and trust the people who are taking care of your child in your absence. The PAIIR teachers are fantastic and loving and exude warmth and caring. You know your child is in safe hands. You know the teachers well. You know the other kids. You know their parents. You know that you have similar values if you are attending a program like PAIIR.

When you send your child to Kindergarten it is a very scary thing for many PAIIR parents. You're used to being involved in your child's life and knowing with whom he/she's interacting. Often your introduction to your child's Kindergarten teacher is a quick "hello" and "welcome" and you're left feeling unprepared to trust this person with your precious baby.

That's not to say that my children haven't had great Kindergarten teachers. The two that have gone to Kindergarten so far have had wonderful teachers and I know they are good people.

The truth is, you have to make the effort yourself to get to know your child's teacher and the children in the class. You may even get to know some of the parents. It's up to you. Volunteer in your child's class if at all possible. I know it's hard for many. But if you can use some of that vacation time to get to know your child's world, please do so. You will find it remarkably rewarding.

I know most of my children's classmates by name. I know their personalities. The smile and say hi when they see me. I've helped them. They see I care about them. Kindergarten is a big year for children and parents, full of transitions and new experiences. It's also the best year to get to know the children and the teachers who will be forming your child's life for the next 6 years or more.

Make the experience transitioning to Kindergarten the best it can be. Make an effort. Talk to the teachers, talk to the children. If there are other parents around, talk with them.

There's nothing better than, if your child has to go through a bad experience with another child, knowing exactly the child he/she is talking about...because you've met him/her, you've talked to him/her. And next time you volunteer you can give that child the stink eye. Just kidding.

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Heather is a stay at home mom to three kids: an 8-year-old daughter who is in third grade, a 6-year-old son who is in first grade and a 2-year-old daughter who still gets to hang out with mom at home.

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Are you sending a child to Kindergarten next fall (2011)? Join PAIIR at the Kickoff to Kindergarten November 11 from 4-7 p.m. at Northrop Education Center. Representatives from the Rochester School District will be on hand to answer your questions.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Take me out to the movies

This is my first blog, which I liken to writing a journal entry. To let you know a little about me, my husband and I have been married for over 26 years and have two daughters. One is recently married and the other just finished her junior year in college. I’ve been a licensed parent educator since 2000.

On Sunday our family had lunch with our extended family where we had an energetic discussion of movies and video games. My niece had seen Iron Man 2 the night before. She was upset that there were young children viewing a movie that was rated PG 13. Another family member gave an enlightening point of view that the draw of adventure movies or video games is that you, or your child, can experience something that can’t be experienced in real life. Children get to experience what it might be like to interact with a centaur, mermaid, or minotaur! Knowing that young children aren’t able to differentiate between real life and fantasy, I question if it is the best for them to experience these fantasies, especially if it includes an action-adventure character like Iron Man, Spider Man, or a Transformer. These characters can dehumanize us as people. They can minimize or ignore feelings that caring people have.

I understand that parents like to go to a movie or maybe play a video game with their child as a way of connecting. I am curious how do you decide which movie to see with your child? How do you determine what is age-appropriate for your child? There are so many choices for parents to make. And with the heavy marketing of movies via commercials, there is even more pressure from children to their parents to see what seems popular. I’d love to hear from you how you make the decision of what to allow your child to watch or play.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

What Parenting Books are the Most Helpful?

As my husband and I complete our first year as parents I find myself thinking about the journey thus far. Overall we have experienced great joy, yet we have at times struggled to make sense of everything that has happened and had our share of discussions as to how to deal with things. From breasfeeding, to getting our son to sleep in his own crib, to going back to work concerns, we have had plenty of discussions and many times where we could have used an expert's guide or manual.

I like to read research and a bunch of other people's ideas on how best to go about things, especially parenting, and then mix all the ideas up and come up with this collage of ideas that suits our needs at that particular time. As my husband and I are hands-on learning about parenting, I decided it was a good time to read, research, and create one of these conglomerate theories to, “make everything make sense”.

I started at the library in the parenting section, a section that has its own mini-sections, with parenting books on topics you hope you never have to deal with as a parent. As I skimmed over title after title I thought about whether I would actually have time to read any of these books, and about what other real life parents have read and gotten some wisdom from.

So, please share:
What is your favorite parenting book (title and author)?
How has it helped you as a parent?
How did you find time to read it? Just kidding!


Jen; Mother to a 1 year old boy, who makes regular trips to the library but rarely gets out of the children's section.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Family Faces Toddler Book

When my oldest child was born, she was only a few months old when her paternal grandparents headed to Florida for the winter. Before they left, I figured out a way to keep them in the baby's life while they were out of state.

I made a square board book with photos of our family members so that my daughter would get to know the faces of the most important people in her life--her family. My oldest liked her book so much, that when my son came along I made one for him too. Actually both of them still enjoy looking at those books today.

It was only natural that when my last child came along that I would make one for her as well. It's worked well for our kids so I thought I'd show you how I made them.














Things you need:
mat board (the kind used in framing--I got mine at Hobby Lobby)
photos of family members' faces
clear packing tape
markers
scissors
hole punch
binder ring

The amount of mat board you need will depend on how many family members you are putting in your book. I made my kids' books with photos of themselves, siblings, Mom and Dad, aunts and uncles and cousins. You also need to decide on a size. I made all of my kids' books 3 inches x 3 inches. It's a nice size, still small enough to tuck in the diaper bag yet big enough to hold a decent sized photo. If you don't have a template to trace and cut your squares from, perhaps you have a plastic storage container that is roughly the size you want that you can trace the lid for a pattern.














Once you have your pages cut you can decide if you want to cover the mat board with different papers. For my older kids' books I made each page a different color so that we could use the books to teach colors as well as for looking at family faces. With my youngest child's book I was too lazy for that step so I just used the mat boards as is.

Next cut your photos into squares that will fit on your pages with extra room around the edges. I cropped my photos in my photo editing software and printed them out the sizes I wanted on photo paper.

Position your photos with enough space beneath them to write the person's name and tack in place with a small piece of tape. Write the person's name underneath with marker. I added Uncle before my brother's name and Cousin before the cousins' names as well. I also made a front and back cover.















Decide on the order of your pages and stack them up. Punch a hole in the corner of each page with a hole punch taking care to leave enough space before the hole so that your book won't pull apart and making sure to punch the correct corner in each page.

Now you're ready to tape. I tried to make sure I didn't have any tape lines over the person's face and also made sure to cover every part of the page, including the sides. The first time I made one of these books I tried to use contact paper to make the book water-resistant but it didn't work as well as just using the clear packing tape.

Once you've taped all the pages, you'll need to punch the holes again. Then slide the binder ring through all the pages, close it up and you're done!






***Heather is mom to three children: a 7-year-old daughter, a 5-year-old son and a 20-month-old daughter.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Say hello but don’t get too close!

Today I had another parent ask me when its time to talk to your kids about stranger safety. I know from reading about the subject that the whole stranger safety campaign has been basically unsuccessful. It has succeeded in scaring the heck out of parents and studies show that kids will typically go with a stranger anyway if that person promises a puppy, says they need help or any other number of lures a creative, determined mind can generate.

Then there is the fact that most abductions or inappropriate touching of children is done by people who are not strangers- but family members or close friends. I often suggest to parents to teach their children that the parts of their bodies that are covered by underwear or bathing suits are private- and that you calmly teach them that its only mommy’s (or daddy’s , or the doctor’s or whoever is deemed a safe adult by the parent) job to take care of the private parts of their bodies.

This is such an important subject but I get sad when I know parents are worrying about their children in their own back (fenced-in) yard. I want to see a different world with kids feeling free to say hello to other people in the store and feeling safe walking down the block to their neighbor’s house. But children need to learn limits as well- like staying by dad’s side in a crowded place or not going through doors or into elevators without parents close by. How can kids become independent if parents have to hover?

Please weigh in on this topic.

Linda Thomas/PAIIR